My Best Friend and My Man

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My Best Friend and My Man

Vernon is a Black woman in her late 20s that has a good professional job with the city of Houston. The only thing missing in her life is a man. The book starts out with her sitting alone on Valentine’s Day and no date in sight. When an old flame calls and invites her out, she jumps at the chance even though it’s last minute. Everything is good until Vernon finds out the only reason she was called is this guy and his girlfriend had a fight and he wanted a stand in. Frustrated with her love life, Vernon asks her best friend, Demetria for help.
Demetria has men flocking around her. They give her whatever she wants and even stuff she doesn’t even know she wants. Demetria never has problems finding dates but has more problems turning guys away. Vernon wants that, whatever that is. Demetria is overjoyed that her friend has finally seen the light and is willing to put herself in Demetria’s hands. Demetria has major changes in store for Vernon, everything from hair to attitude.
Seaphes works for the city of Houston, also. He’s one fine looking man and Vernon is definitely interested in getting to know him better. When Seaphes seems to be interested back, Vernon looks to Demetria for advise. Seaphes doesn’t want to play games but Demetria is advising all kinds of them. What should Vernon do?
This book was written by a Black woman and is written for the Black community though others might enjoy it. Several cultural aspects are brought up and discussed in the book like hair weaves and the difficulty of finding a professional Black man. This book was also written in the jargon that the characters would have used. This is a bit distracting if you don’t use or hear it everyday until you get use to it. 
The characters though are very well written. Because each chapter in the book from either Vernon, Demetria or Seaphes’s point of view, the reader can see a situation from more than one view point. This also allows more background information to be given on each of the main characters and their inter relections. Because you get a really feeling for the characters you can almost understand why Demetria goes after Seaphes even though she knows that Vernon is interested in him.
Though the characters are very well written, I didn’t like everything that I read about them. I felt that morals were missing and I was reading about a culture that I not only didn’t know anything about but one that I didn’t want to. Seaphes has decided that women fall into 10 different groups and until he finds the one that he wants to be with, it’s okay to sleep with the rest including his boss. Vernon and Demetria accept that most men sleep around and sex is fine whenever. Demetria likes that men give her things and expects that it’s her due. She doesn’t necessarily like them and she really doesn’t care if she’s taking stuff from one but having sex with another while the first is out of town.
I also wasn’t too pleased with the thought that you have to have a man to make yourself whole. The thought that you need to change yourself or play games so that you can get some man’s interest turned me off. It was refreshing when Seaphes stated that he didn’t want any game playing that he was too old for that. I have to agree with him. A professional woman by her late 20s should be confident enough in herself and with who she is to not need a man to fulfill her. While having a guy is great, playing silly games and not being yourself with men is not.
At the back of this book is a readers guide suggesting that the author/publisher thinks this would be a good book for a book club. Maybe. It does lend itself to that purpose but given the lack of morals and lots of references to sex, it would need to be an adult book club. 
I have no idea if this book is a good representation of today’s Black community. In some ways, I hope not. I would like to think that our children, regardless of color, are growing up to be strong adults that can interact with each other without games or playing a role.   I would like to think that honesty, hard work and valuing family and friends are part of our 20 something generation. 


Book Blurb for My Best Friend and My Man

The things women will do–to men and to each other–in search of love Veron Darcey is a twentysomething African American woman who wants it all: a successful career, an upwardly mobile life, and a loving, attentive man. But the last few men Veron has been with have either added her to their five-woman rotation or relegated her to the dreaded “just friends” zone.

After one particularly bad date, Veron caves in and asks her best friend, Demetria Sparks, to share her secrets. Demetria is a gorgeous woman who has something special–men line up to paint her toenails and lavish her with Caribbean cruises and diamond rings. Demetria tries to give Veron a mind-and-body makeover, but sweet Veron struggles with being aggressive. And when Demetria demonstrates her method on Veron’s dream guy, Seaphes, his lack of interest provokes her to pull out all the stops–and forces Veron into a fierce competition between mentor and student. With pressure (and sexual tension) mounting, Veron begins to wonder if changing herself is a mistake. But is it too late to back off her new game now that she’s gotten a juicy taste of just what she’s capable of?


Night Owl Reviews Jul, 2008 3.00